THERE is no piping aboard, no fluttering ensigns, no bridge, engine room, quarterdeck or even a bow – the Bibby Stockholm is as far from a ship as is possible to get.
It is a 10,000-tonne, 300ft-long hotel with a football pitch, TV rooms and a 24-hour restaurant.
The only thing making it a barge is the fact that it floats.
So the idea that a left-wing charity helped scupper the plan for one migrant to go aboard because he had a fear of water is touching on the absurd.
Having been invited by the Home Office for a tour round the much-delayed facility, you wouldn’t even know you’re on the water.