“You start to think everything is normal. You get reconditioned to thinking it is OK,” Kate, 52, tells me. “I like to think I’m an intelligent person, but it happens without you realising. You get desensitised. They are masters at control and manipulation and making you think it is your fault – that you are the unreasonable one.”
Three years ago Kate left her partner of 20 years: a narcissist. “Something flipped inside me,” she says, “and I just thought, you know what, I’m going to go.” Today she has a new partner and a happy life. Her ex is being investigated by the police for his behaviour towards her and a number of other women.
“To strangers and to the outside world he would
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