Harry should spare a thought for his family

Harry’s memoir is set to cause a splash in the Royal Family (Image: Getty)What changed my mind was the revelation that he is planning to come to the UK to promote his memoir, Spare. What’s the betting he stays at Frogmore Cottage while trashing his family?OK, we can show him what we think about that. Everywhere he goes he should be greeted with shouts of ‘God save the King’ or ‘God bless the Prince of Wales’. No need for ill-mannered booing or rude placards or custard pies dripping down his beard, just a display of solidarity behind the Royal Family.Heaven knows, this country has tried hard enough. Meghan was given an enthusiastic welcome, their wedding was celebrated in towns and villages throughout the land and even when they scarpered there was quite a lot of sympathy. When I predicted what to me was bloomin’ obvious and said Meghan could be trouble I was furiously attacked on indignant social media.Meghan wants the lifestyle of an A-list celebrity without having risen above an actress in a legal-themed TV drama. Harry wants all the privileges of being royalwithout being royal, so a grown man in his 30s, he moans that daddy doesn’t keep him any more. Spoiled doesn’t even begin to describe it.The only way they can fund their extravagant sense of entitlement is through selling malicious gossip about Harry’s nearest but presumably no longer dearest. Well, that has a shelf life so they had better put the rewards of betrayal in Archie’s piggy bank in preparation for that rainy day.Do grow up, Harry. It is still not too late.Much is being made of Qatar’s attitude towards women, which is little better than medieval, but sometimes I try to look at the West through Muslim eyes.Young girls with plunging necklines and skirts up to heaven knows where fall off pavements on Friday nights as drunk as owls. On a family show such as Strictly Come Dancing clothes can be gorgeous but are often more or less absent. Casual sex is rife.As once did Soviet Russia, Eastern states now think the West decadent. We are.The Government has lost any semblance of control over illegal migration. We were supposed to have an agreement with Albania to return its nationals but some 70 percent of those arriving in boats are said to be Albanian and nothing is done.As for the Rwanda scheme, there seems no serious will to overcome any legal objections. Successive home secretaries have talked big and done less than little. Meanwhile Labour has no answer at all and politicians on both sides are still talking about co-operating with Macron when all the French have ever done is take the money and yawn while the migrants leave their shores.Suella Braverman must give us action, not words and pretty darn quick. Braverman has vowed to take action on the migrant crisis (Image: PA)Oh no! My alma mater has gone all politically correct and woke. One of my autumn pleasures is the arrival of The Brown Book, the annual publication of Lady Margaret Hall, Oxford, with news of alumni and their doings, going back to those graduating in the 1940s.I was enjoying it when I spotted the announcement. In the past news had always been presented in the third person but from now on it would be written in the first person to avoid offending people by the misuse of personal pronouns. Ye gods! Is nothing sacred?Right. Just to be blinking awkward I will in future send in my news in the third person, personal pronouns and all.Rishi Sunak wants children to study maths and English in the sixth form regardless of their choice of A Levels. Why? If the schools and examination boards are doing their job GCSE level will give basic competence in those subjects, which is all anyone needs.Throughout my life I have needed good arithmetic and the sort of logic promoted by algebra but I can say with my hand on my heart that, since the age of 15, I have not once had to identify a congruent triangle, solve a quadratic equation or worry about sines and cosines.Furthermore, if I had been obliged to take maths beyond O Level standard, I would have struggled and it would have been a distraction from the four subjects (including English) which I chose to pursue as well as a guaranteed lower grade dragging down my overall results.No, thanks, Rishi. The PM wants A Level students to study English and Maths, regardless of their options (Image: PA)I am all for saving money but the £250million Rishi will save by abandoning the idea of a replacement for the yacht Britannia, which was to be manned by the Navy and used to promote trade globally will probably prove a false economy. It was part of Boris’s vision and it had enormous potential to showcase Britain and win deals.Scrooge is not always the best role model.Sir Keir Starmer has already refused to define what a woman is and now refuses, despite being asked repeatedly in an interview, to say whether comic Eddie Izzard would qualify for an all-women shortlist. If he can’t answer a question as simple as that, do we really want him running the country?