 In April this year, a few months after splitting up with a long-term boyfriend, I decided to dip my toe back into the romance pool. Here's the plot twist, though. Dating doesn't have to just be about dating. If you enjoy someone's company, why not become friends? 'It's not possible,' I hear you shout. Well, I'm going to flip that narrative and explain how and why I have become mates with my 'failed' dates – and why I think you should try it too. In the few months since I started swiping, it's been an interesting journey with both good and bad experiences. One particularly awful date lasted less than an hour – our views differed too much on everything from politics to the royals – we had a heated debate before I downed my bourbon, excused myself and left. We tend not to focus on 'negative outcomes' like this and that's understandable. Even I, the outspoken sex columnist, don't always like to admit that modern dating can be stressful and that rejection hurts. So in the past I've put these unfortunate events (or more accurately, soul-destroying dates) into a neat little box, deleted the other person's phone number and kept going. But why let a good connection go to waste just because it didn't end up being a love story? So far this year, I've made two new friends and rather than meeting them at events or through mates, both are men I briefly had a fling with. Jeremy* and I had three dates before he called it quits halfway through a pub quiz. Now that's awkward. The conversation came out of nowhere, as they often do, and he just explained that he had realised he wasn't ready for dating. I was surprised but not upset, since we'd only met a few times. If anything, I was more annoyed that we missed the rest of the quiz because we were aiming to win the jackpot. We had spent most of our dates laughing and got along so well that it felt wrong to cut contact completely. For weeks afterwards, Jeremy and I kept){kind=link}
NEWS… BUT NOT AS YOU KNOW IT
In April this year, a few months after splitting up with a long-term boyfriend, I decided to dip my toe back into the romance pool.
Here’s the plot twist, though.
Dating doesn’t have to just be about dating. If you enjoy someone’s company, why not become friends?
‘It’s not possible,’ I hear you shout. Well, I’m going to flip that narrative and explain how and why I have become mates with my ‘failed’ dates – and why I think you should try it too.