Melanie Hawkes was 43 when she paid a sex worker to help her lose her virginity. She hopes that by speaking out about her experience she’ll inspire other people with disabilities to do the same
There’s no right age to lose your virginity. It should only be when you’re ready, it’s legal and there’s full consent. Navigating your first time, and all the encounters after that, should be fun, exciting, and enjoyable but for those experiencing the world of sex and dating, while living with complex disabilities, it can more be complicated than usual.
One woman has now opened up about losing her virginity aged 43 to a sex worker in the hopes that it will inspire others to get to have all of life’s pleasures without feeling embarrassed. Melanie Hawkes, from Perth, Australia, was diagnosed with transverse myelitis, a disorder caused by inflammation of the spinal cord when she was two years old.
Her parents rushed her to the hospital after noticing she appeared “drunk”, falling over and stumbling. Having previously been a child who was walking and talking, the sudden changes caused instant worry for the family.
While some children recovered fully from the illness, doctors revealed the disorder caused Melanie to lose the ability to move her legs and only have limited mobility in her arms. As such, at three years old she and her family were told she need to use a wheelchair for the rest of her life. She also has to live with occasional pain and issues with her breathing, meaning she needs a support worker to help her everyday life.