, but achieving it often feels impossibly hard. Faced with an overwhelming set of daily challenges, it seems we are increasingly prone to shrug and say, 'What can I do?' The more I talk to other mothers about it, the more I see how widespread this helpless feeling is. They say they want their children to spend less time gaming, but don't know how to achieve that. (Or, more truthfully, they do know how but lack the energy for the fight.) They want their children to eat something other than sausages and pizza, but know if they serve these meals, their fussy children will at least eat something. 'I let my toddler eat quite a lot of crisps every day for lunch as she won't eat much else, but I know it's not nutritious,' says Isobel*, 37. 'I just prefer she eats something, and it avoids mealtime battles.' 'We always let our 7-year-old watch more television than she probably should,' says Anika*, 39. We all want the best for our children, but achieving it can feel overwhelming at times. Experts say our expe){kind=link}
We all want the best for our children, but achieving it can feel overwhelming at times. Experts say our expectations are too high
It started with a jar of Lotus Biscoff spread, then the growing realisation spread, as it were, from there. My children, aged nine and seven, were demanding it for breakfast. I was firmly opposed: once you let them eat crushed up biscuits before school, you’ve basically lost the battle. And all battles thereafter.
But recently I surrendered. “Fine,” I said. “Just today. But we’re back to something healthier tomorrow.” Then the next day they had Biscoff spread, and the day after that, and then I understood that I had given up. I felt helpless. It was easier this way. They got out of bed and ate breakfast without complaining, freeing me up for the trillion other jobs that need doing at 7.45am.
The Biscoff spread for me is emblematic of a dilemma at the heart of modern parenting: we want the best for our children, and we roughly know what the best looks like (healthy diets, limited screen time, homework completed, enough sleep); but achieving it often feels impossibly hard. Faced with an overwhelming set of daily challenges, it seems we are increasingly prone to shrug and say, “What can I do?”
The more I talk to other mothers about it, the more I see how widespread this helpless feeling is. They say they want their children to spend less time gaming, but don’t know how to achieve that. (Or, more truthfully, they do know how but lack the energy for the fight.) They want their children to eat something other than sausages and pizza, but know if they serve these meals, their fussy children will at least eat something.